if i knew how to pray and really believed in it,
i would be down on my knees begging for some clarity.
i don’t trust myself anymore —
when it comes to making decisions,
when it comes to trusting people,
when it comes to holding on or letting go.
i wish private words remained private.
unbroken by a gesture of well intention.
i appreciate the loyalty
but i’m pained by what was said.
i know it happens to everyone, i do not have the monopoly
of feeling that an injustice has been done;
but it hurts no less and it cuts deeper this time because i really cared.
and i still do even while my trust gets dragged through the mud.
